08
May

Jealousy and Polyamory

Polyamory and the onset of Jealousy

polyamoryIntroduction

Just like no one is immune to anger and love, no one is immune to jealous too. Jealous has many definitions as per the situation. In general, it can be taken to mean the envious of oneself possession or that of another person. It is this jealousy that makes people closely guard their possessions. Polyamory, on the other hand, is the desire to be in several intimate relationships and with the consent of all the parties involved. Therefore, there arises a conflict of interest between the two ideas. People are known to be jealous of their relationships being poked by others yet they still want to practice polyamory. This leads to an issue termed as polyamory and jealousy.

How the two arises

A Polyamorous relationship involves a person having different intimate partners. It is this intimacy that makes any relationship to last. However, being intimate with many people may make the parties in the relationships jealous. It is a man’s nature to protect his territory. This can further be justified by animals too as they also preserve what they have. People in these relationships claim to be free from jealousy which may be termed as vague.

Modern understanding of jealousy

It has come be known that, it is not the case of seeing your partner with other mates that make you jealous, but after effects. These include the feeling of being vulnerable in a relationship. Everyone needs to feel secured. Jealousy, on the other hand, makes somebody feel mistreated, vulnerable and thus unsecure. It becomes even worse when an individual never talks about it but lets it pile up in the heart. Such an act may lead to a person acting weirdly out of hunger. It may even result to violence in a relationship. Since it is them who desire to live that way, the best solution for them would be to cope with it which would, therefore, lead to acceptance.

Conclusion

It is certain that jealousy is the main problem in polyamorous. People should be educated on how to cope with it or else shun from practicing polyamorous relationships.


POLYAMORY: Making Poly Love Work — video.newsweek.com

Dealing with Grief Mourning The Loss of a Loved One

Dealing with Grief and Depression when mourning your loved One

depression-grief-1Have you ever been left by someone you cherished? Are you feeling emptiness and despair while overcoming grief? Do you think there is no future without them? Does everyone seem not to understand how you are feeling? This could be good sign of depression due to the loss of that person you adored.

There are several things you need to know about depression when mourning. They include:

  • It is not everyone who suffers depression after the loss. For those who are caught in the middle of it, they will find themselves in deep thoughts that will cause loneliness and finally depression. They will have signs like little motivation, low self-esteem, confusion, insomnia and dormancy.
  • Acknowledge depression: Listen to yourself and try to answer the question about how you’re feeling at that time. Refusing to accept that a situation has happened will prolong your state of depression.
  • Talk to your loved ones: Whenever you withdraw from people’s presence, you will find that physical and emotional stress will tend to pile up leading to depression in later dates. Speaking out your heart and mind and also forgiving others and yourself is a good solution to your depressed state.
  • Make use of physical exercises to help you deal with the state of depression. This will help to rejuvenate your blood circulation and thus activating your brain.
  • Use a symbol in loving memories of your loved one.
  • Stop feeling negative about yourself. You should learn to see the positive side of life and stop killing yourself with things that might not even be the case.
  • You learn to accommodate uncertainties. Learn what you can and cannot control and accept situations you cannot change.

Learn about things that will help you get out of depression while learning to overcome grief. You should learn how to deal with guilt, fear and negative thoughts.

Other videos on overcoming grief:


CrossTalk: Gaza’s grief

Amazing Tips on Writing a Romance Novel

AMAZING TIPS ON WRITING ROMANCE NOVEL

writing-romance-1A romance novel has powerful words. It can blow away your mind, show a great level of creativity, and leave behind characters that go beyond life. It will leave the story still fresh in the minds of the reader. A good reader is able to see the whole story with inner eyes as descriptions are made throughout the novel.

The following tips will help write an amazing romance novel:

The settings should be developed

There should be enough space to ensure that the characters make their romance relevant. This means that if a woman falls in love with a messenger, they should meet may be behind the delivery offices. These lovers may also find a decent place to engage in romance after several meetings are done.

Characters should be developed

A writer should ensure that he or she is dealing with real lives and practical situations that would show a great depth of romance. Romance should be expressed in a way that it appears real to almost every reader.

You can also make sure that you meet real people in the story

If a person receives an action that is worth a reward, then it should be rewarded. On the other hand, if a person has got a bad experience with another person, there should be a sign of anger and despair.

Make sure you capture the reader’s attention

You can make the reader almost to reach orgasm but don’t give it in full. Make them feel pleasure and excitement during the whole story. Keep their fire and feelings burning and wanting to hear more from the you.

Make the conflict appear like drama.  Historical romance is a popular genre and has been for decades.  Donna Hatch is an amazing historical romance author.  Her style should be studied and emulated.

You can give conflict some features to bite the romance. Ensure things just don’t flow. At least they should work for it a bit. Normally, it is not easy to find someone you will love for life. Therefore, a reader should not be given a ride till the end of the romance. It should show some struggles before things get where they end up.

Strategy should be built

Assume one character likes criticizing faults that the other does not like to hear about. This will result to a real situation which might end up being comfortable.

Allow your character to flow

When these characters are not following this protocol, ensure you find a way that may not be a real one to make it work. When basis is created, your story will always work out.

Ensure all trails are trod

Every part that pertains to the story should be told and none should be left to readers to conclude on their own. This will make the reader to get the correct flow of romance.

Make sure your story ends with flares

You have to make sure that after your romance novel is read; it will remain in the mind and heart of the reader. You have to end your romance in a way that will leave your reader well entertained and mouth gasped. It should leave them with a “what!”

Lastly, edit your work. This will help you discover errors that will bring a different meaning to your story. An edited work is well understood by reader.


How Much Fact Do You Need to Write Good Historical Fiction?

Treating Stress Symptoms

Treating stress symptoms

stress-2Stress poses a lot of danger such as, headaches, high blood pressure, digestive problems, eating disorders and weakens body immunity. It is the major cause of sadness, uncontrolled weeping, temper issues, irritability and depression. It can leads to misunderstanding and dents social cohesion leading to withdrawal. However, stress can be managed or treated and here are general guidelines:

1. Have a diet watch

Eating a balanced diet is important to body function and dealing with some stress causes. It is advisable to eat vegetables, fruits and drink a lot of water. Having a diet watch is important as stress may lead to eating disorder which is a common symptom. Planning what to eat and being selective will reduce stomach problems.

2. Create boundaries

Most people are pressured since they do not set boundaries on what they can or cannot do. In addition, accepting changes within every stage of life is equally helpful in stress reduction. Most importantly, confrontation helps one conquer and all issues should be addressed with love and respect. For instance, an individual should learn to say no, express negative feelings or hurt and function within zones of personal responsibility.

3. Physical activity

Involving physical exercise daily for about 30 minutes is helpful. Exercising does not have to be rigorous; it can involve walking or dancing and playing. This kind of involvement deals with isolation which is a breeding for pity parties and negative thoughts. However, one can spend time alone in a healthy way and deal with an issue effectively.

4. Avoid substance abuse

Quit drinking and give up smoking or self medication without prescription. Substance abuse interferes with ability to cope with stress in a positive way. In addition, misuse of substances could shoot up stress levels especially where there is an addiction.

5. Learn stress management tricks

Depending on personal belief, one can take yoga for meditation and for enhancing self awareness. There are other techniques such as doing a journal, talking to air space or an imaginary friend. In addition, finding activities that provoke excitement such as watching a favorite game, comedy or playing a favorite sport. Excitement releases endorphins chemicals that deal with pain related issues.

If symptoms persist, it is advisable to seek medical attention. Visiting a psychologist or a physician is helpful as they can easily identify causes and offer immediate ways of solving the same. Seeking the advice of a good marriage counselor can be helpful if your stresses interfere with your relationships.  Some people minimize the benefits of counseling, yet if one is being handled by a professional, confidentiality is highly regarded and counselors act to the best interest of their patients.

Lastly, one can seek support from close family and friends as most addictions or breakdowns are stress related. An everyday conversation is helpful even with strangers that are harmless. Most importantly, guarding the thoughts process will certainly influence the psychological position of any individual.

Tips & warnings

  • Find a reputable marriage counseling specialist if considering therapy or marriage therapyas an option.
  • Learn stressors cause cycle, what time stress hits and what triggers it.
  • Listen to yourself and changes others may be pointing at, they could be signs of stress.

♦Part 9♦ Marriage Counseling and Relationship Advice ❃Bishop T.D Jakes❃